My Deep, Insightful, and Entirely Novel Think-Piece on Living One Day without a Mobile Device

It fucking sucks! I hate it! It’s total bullshit! Who are you people??? What is going on??? Oh my GOD I just hate EVERYTHING.
I sold my iPad, and now I’m waiting a day for a return and exchange on a phone to go through. Thus, no mobile device. Ugh! Why would anyone voluntarily do this?

Gah!!!

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